TKPJ Makes a Choice (Finally)

Hi! Remember me? I haven’t been around so much lately… sorry guys, but now I’m back! So I have had a problem for a while and I think I finally solved it. My problem is that two of my favorite guys in the K-Pop world are good Christians and neither can go into my baby daddy category….

I’m talking Taeyang and Siwon. Both are super hot and have bodies that can make girls go faint. To solve my problem I thought I could do a list of pros and cons, but of course I am too indecisive, you can ask TKPA. So that did not help. All the while I was thinking that both do not do sex before marriage and both really hadn’t had girlfriends. Here comes another problem…. I have a giant crush on another man! While I was listening to some music, one person’s voice really stuck out to me, who always really stands out and I can’t get enough of his sexy voice: Teddy.

Oh God, how he can rap a whole three lines in Tae’s song and totally steal my attention from Tae for the rest song. After listening to “Where U At” several times I decided that I can’t live without Teddy being somewhere on my list.

How do you think I will work out my dilemma?

 

Teddy is very attractive to me. He has the confidence that just shows through in his pictures. I like his body structure even though I have not seen anything that he is working underneath. Teddy is also very successful. He was in 1TYM and he now produces music. His voice is so sexy that if he just said one sentence to me I would do anything he wanted. Whenever his lends his voice in other artists music I stop and replay it over and over again. Just imagine him whispering dirty things in your ear in a crowded room that would drive you crazy until you attacked him as soon as you got into the parking garage or your car. Tearing clothes off without even thinking. MMMMhhhhmmmm!
 

 

I don’t even know where to begin with describing this cutie. He is cute and sweet. He has a hot body I would love to lick every inch of because it is rock hard. I can only imagine he would be the best husband ever because he would be the type of guy that would buy you flowers on the walk home or would go out and buy you your favorite, a caramel apple, because he knew you would love it and him. So with Tae I could see him being all shy until you get him behind closed doors and he has the room all lit with candles and the mood just right, of course after you say “I do.” I have no doubt there is a sex god waiting to explode out of him the moment he sees my lacey lingerie just waiting for him to touch. Oh yes I have plans for him if we get married. :)

Oh, Siwon is all I can think when I look at this man’s face. First off let me say that he has an awesome body and face, and he is TALL. Yes that four letter word means a lot because I like tall guys. I like to lean up to kiss them, stand on my tippy toes and just wait for them to scoop me up and lay one on me. I can see Siwon doing that. Although the bad thing about Siwon is he puts this cover up that he is a perfect gentleman, but he can give an intense bitch look which makes me feel he might not be future husband material. But can you imagine the hot angry sex after you did something to deserve that bitch look? Oh yeah, it would be hot, steamy, angry and passionate. There is a lot of power in that look.

I have put off choosing my future husband long enough. After a long thought I decided that Teddy should be on my Baby-Daddy-To-Be List because he is older and he can support our children. Also I think he would make a great father! I choose Siwon to Be My Boyfriend because I can see us being a fling of hot dirty sex that I will seduce him into. No one can resist my seducing powers once I release them! My Future Husband will be Tae because I think he would be the best husband in the world and plus I get to make hot, passionate love to him every day. How can I resist his gentle smile and the love in his eyes?

I think I always knew he was going to win over Siwon. It was just a matter of time.

TKPJ

Aw, Kyu is All Grown Up!

And looking pretty damn sex, if I must say!

I'm loving the short hair. Dirrrty Geek finally looks like he's been pried from Starcraft and given a shower, shave, and haircut. He looks less of a complete nerd who would rather sit in front of a computer and play a game for five days straight than do anything else. Oh, but we know that nerd is still deep within.

That's okay, though. He kind of has the whole Clark Kent thing going on. But instead of a super hero who can fly and is faster than a speeding bullet, he's a pale Korean kid with a microphone and who can probably hack into your bank account and deplete your savings.

But Sungmin ... Oh, lovey. No. Just no, dear. Your hair is too silky and too bouncy and too feminine for a dude to be wearing. I'm sure Pretty Pretty Princess is throwing a shit-fit around the dorm, and I bet you two have even gotten into a bitch fight or two over the fact that he keeps stealing your shampoo. Sungmin, you should know better! Heechul is the one and only pretty member in Super Junior, and you're making him look ... well, slightly manly.

Whatever.

Kyuhyun looks damn hot. And that is the only important thing you should take away from this blog post.

TKPA

I've Missed You, Lips of Sex

I'm back, SeungHo. Back to cater to your every need and desire. I can tell by the way you're licking and biting your lips that you are excited I am back. I know you've missed me just as much as I have missed you, bb.

And even though I have listened to MBLAQ a disgusting amount while I have been away, I have not been paying attention to those Starburst lips. I know you love that more than anything, the way I go crazy seeing you slide your tongue slowly out of your mouth, glide it along that plump, juicy bottom lip, pull your lip back inside your mouth, then gently bite down on it with those massive pearly whites of yours.

Oh, man. I need to stop. Just that little move of yours is orgasm-inducing all on it's own. If you work on your sex stare, you can have the entire female population doing whatever you want. I mean, we'll do it anyway because we love you and because just the possibility of having those lips on our bodies is worth committing murder ... but with that sex stare and those Starburst lips?

Oh, there will be a lot of female serial killers. Yes.

TKPA

DAMN!!!

I just exploded. Literally.

Lips of Sex knows -- he just knows -- that I love those pink, juicy, Starburst lips of his. He knows that I have built a shrine to them in the form of a folder on my desktop containing any and all pictures I can find of him licking those beauties.

It just makes me want to lick his lips to see if they really do taste like pink Starbursts. If I were to bite into them gently, do you think some juicy goodness would flow out?

Why do you tease us so, Lips of Sex?! It's just unfair.

Sidenote, how many of you would line up if SeungHo started and operated a kissing booth to help end world hunger? Fifty cents to suck on his lips for a few seconds? I'll give you my entire life's savings and sell my kidney on the Black Market.

TKPA

Kyuhyun is So Yummy

I love this man. He's so incredibly gorgeous and sexy. And damn are his lips plump and juicy.

Beautiful. Kind of resembles God of Lips and Lips of Sex, huh? They all must have the same great-great-great grandfather that passed on luscious lip genes.

I'm glad that Dirrrty Geek is my boyfriend. Yes, my boyfriend. I even placed him in that category. Some might say that I won't be able to tolerate his addiction to Starcraft, but they're wrong. See, I'm a bit of an insomniac myself, so while he's awake in the middle of the night, playing Starcraft and developing zombie eyes, and I'm lying next to him in bed on my laptop blogging for all of you and developing zombie eyes, we'll be insomniacs together.

And then when it's time to go to actually go to sleep, we won't. Instead we'll get naked and we'll act out all of the dirty things I just blogged about while he totally dominates me. By the time we actually cuddle up next to each other, bodies still damp with sex-sweat, we'll only have an hour of sleep before the alarm goes off.

Besides, you know that Kyu would totally blow off playing and watching Starcraft for me. I'm not asking him to give it up entirely or anything like that, but if I were to say, "Kyu, babe, come to bed" all suggestively, he'd look at me, look at his computer, look back at me, look back at his computer, sigh, and then he'd toss me over his shoulder, freely and willingly taking me back into the bedroom to dominate me. Because doesn't he just look like the type to dominate in bedroom activities?

I'm telling you ... you gotta watch out for those maknaes.

In short ... Kyuhyun in my boyfriend. Sorry, TKPJ.

TKPA

SeungHo, You'll Also Be My Boyfriend

Yes, SeungHo is now in two categories:

Strictly a Dirty, Dirty Fantasy and Be My Boyfriend.

I know that the two do not mix and it makes zero sense. But let me explain. I cannot resist the rookie leader and his luscious lips. I will forever wonder what they taste like if I were to nibble on them and bite them. I think it'd taste like a pink Starburst, because they kind of look like pink Starbursts, no?

Those pink beauties have sparked so many dirty thoughts in my brain. And I'm not a lip-girl, honestly. No, I prefer jaws over lips. Except for SeungHo's. I want those lips something hardcore. Plus, you know, those pants of his during his multiple "Oh Yeah" performances also ignites some racy thoughts and makes me wonder what exactly is being contained in those tighter-than-tight pants.

But he's so cute and gorgeous that I actually want to make him my boyfriend. I actually want him around when I'm not fantasizing about having his lips all over my body. And even though I'll be thinking of having those lips leave little trails of saliva all over my skin when I'm with him, the point is that I want to be with him.

I want to spend the entire day with him, holding hands, kissing in public, reaching disgusting PDA levels. I have no idea why I think of being outdoors, in the freezing cold, with snow covering the ground and the trees, all bundled up next to SH. His nose and cheeks would be all pink from the biting cold, his lips still smooth and luscious (and definitely not chapped!). He'd help me build a snowman, because I am a Florida girl and I make sandcastles, not snowmen.

Afterward, when we're back inside, sitting in front of a fireplace drinking hot chocolate, we'll find another way to keep warm.

And it'll be hotter than the crackling fire.

TKPA

My New Boyfriend, Kyuhyun

Oh, Kyuhyun ...

I wish I could say that your relatively young age is the reason why you didn't make the final cut, but seeing as how you're practically six months older than me, I can't make that excuse. The reason why you weren't chosen is because of this:

I want you to Be My Boyfriend.

It's a very selfish reason, I know, but I'm sure you'd much rather be in this category than be my baby daddy.

There are many benefits to being a boyfriend, Kyu. For one, you can totally sing me to sleep every night. That might not sound like a benefit to you, but it is to me because I love your voice and hearing it makes me turn into a huge TKPA puddle. But I promise you that if you cuddle up next to me and sing into my ear, sending me into a pleasant dream state, you can soon sneak off and go play Starcraft and I will not nag you about how you play that game too much and never spend any time with me. See? It is a benefit.

You've taken the shirt seriously. You're like a ghost.

You might look like the innocent little maknae of the group, but we all know you are not. While I don't think you've reached your freak potential yet, I'd be more than happy to work overtime to help you discover what you're truly capable of. I would totally take away any remaining innocence, bb. And I would not feel guilty about doing it, either.

Sex with you would be fun and spontaneous, like in a stairwell or in the dusty aisle of reference books in the library that no one ever reads. It'd be in the craziest places ever, like the restroom in a restaurant, on a swing in the park, on top of the kitchen table. That last one might not sound particularly crazy, but think about it this way: how hard are you going to laugh when some of your fellow members come over for dinner and are sitting right where we had sex only a few hours earlier? Neither of us would be able to hold in the laughter.

But you're also very sweet and caring, Kyu, and while you might forget to take out the trash or return my phone call because you're too engrossed with Starcraft, I don't see you forgetting the important events. Like birthdays or anniversaries. I can see you making me a birthday cake from scratch and decorating the place with streamers and balloons. You'd put effort into these types of things, and I would show you my gratitude by allowing you to play Starcraft while having sex.

Because you know that that is your biggest nerd fantasy, boo.

TKPA

The Nearly Perfect Boyfriend

Kangin is just so lovable, really. Granted, he has the tough, strong exterior, but inside he's just a big ol' baby that is in dire need of lots of hugs and lots of physical lovin'.

Korea's #1 Handsome Guy would be close to qualifying as the perfect boyfriend. I'm not really a horror movie person (I try not to watch them, seeing as how they make me cry out of sheer terror and I'm already paranoid enough), but if I had Kangin next to me in the theater, I'd consider it. Because he wouldn't mind if I clutched his arm so tightly that circulation ceases just because there is eerie music playing, which you know is a signal something horrific is about to happen! Sure, he'd probably laugh at me and make fun of how scared I was over a stupid movie afterward, but it'd be teasing in a loving way.

And yes, there is the whole temper thing and the whole fiasco of the pub fight he was involved in last month. Bright side is that he would totally stick up for you if some creeper keeps hitting on you while you're just trying to have a good time out with Kangin and your other friends. Down side is that he'd probably get pissed at you easily too, and that's no fun. It'd just result in a lot of alone time in separate rooms until he is calm enough to actually have a conversation with.

The reason why he's "near perfect" is because ... well, he's a bit selfish at times. I'm not judging or anything, because everyone is a tad self-absorbed every now and then, but it's not the best trait to bring into a relationship. He's still young, plenty of time to work on it.

TKPA