Where's the Simple Part?

I finally had a chance to watch Super Junior's new MV for "Mr. Simple" this morning, and kind of having mixed feelings about it. I love seeing my first k-pop love again, seeing new things from them ... but at the same time there was no much that I felt wasn't "new."

It threw me for a loop in the beginning of the MV, when Siwon is focused in on and then Heechul walks by and then Kyuhyun is standing where Siwon should be. To be honest, I looked away for one quick second and the next thing I know Kyuhyun was there. Then I couldn't believe that I mistook Kyu for Siwon and I honestly thought I was a bad fan because I didn't recognize him -- my favorite maknae of all-time (shhhh, don't tell P.O!).

And then Donghae walks by and again, I was so freaking distracted by watching Eunhyuk's jacket fly through the air and magically glide up his arms and onto his shoulders that I didn't notice after Hae walks by the Kyu turns back into Siwon. So at the end I just see Siwon standing there and I'm like "WTF NO YOU WEREN'T THERE!"

SME, why you making us fangirls feel like we're losing our minds?

Then again I have a crappy attention span.

The video starts and I have to admit ... not much of a giddy, excited reaction this time around. Although I did have to replay the beginning a few times because I swear as soon as Leeteuk says, "Hey, I'm Mr. Simple," there is a sound-bite of the Facebook chat notification, that "pop."

But once everything starts and the lights are flashing, distracting you from their choreography -- which is absolutely plain in comparison to previous MVs -- I can see where a lot of people have compared it to "Sorry, Sorry" and "Bonamana." It's the same beat, same sound. And I think because of the fact that "Sorry, Sorry" was such a massive hit, they want to try to duplicate that success, so by making their first singles off these last two albums sound identical to the beat of "Sorry, Sorry" they think they'll have another hit on their hands.

The choreography is really good in some parts, like I love the "x dance" as some of you are calling it. But as for the chorus, it truly is like the "da da da da da da da da da" circle motion in "Sorry, Sorry," only they are standing still and doing it slower.

It's a new song, a new album, a new look for every single one of them ... give us something fresh and exciting.

As far as look goes ... perfect. No complaints at all from me (which you should all know by now is seldom).

Perfect.

 

Perfect.

And as far as Leeteuk goes ...

Yes, please.

Like I said, I like the song a lot, not particularly crazy about the video, but I'm really happy that Super Junior is back once again and I'm so excited to see more from them.

And if I'm not mistaken, I think one of the producers that took part in that atrocious ELF anthem called me out via Twitter and said he'd really like to hear my review for "Got Your Number."

Oh, bring it.

Check out the new MV for Super Junior's "Mr. Simple."

TKPA

Say Whaaat?

Normally, "Say Whaaat?" is reserved for Mondays and Thursdays, but I seriously could not wait until Monday to do this so you're getting it on a Friday and you'll like it!

Leeteuk: I'm on a boat motherfucker, take a look at me. Straight floatin on a boat on the deep blue sea. Busting five knots, wind whipping out my coat. You can't stop me motherfucker 'cause I'm on a boat.

Yesung: Take a picture, trick. I'm on a boat, bitch. We drinkin' Santana champ 'cause it's so crisp. I got my swim trunks and my flippy-floppies. I'm flippin' burgers, you at Kinko's straight flippin' copies.

Han Geng: I'm ridin' on a dolphin, doin' flips and shit. The dolphin's splashing, gettin' everybody all wet. But this ain't Sea World, this is real as it gets. I'm on a boat, motherfucker, don't you ever forget.

Donghae: I'm on a boat, and, it's going fast, and, I got a nautical themed Pashmina afghan. I'm the king of the world, on a boat like Leo. If you're on the shore, then you're sure not me-oh.

Eunhyuk: Fuck land, I'm on a boat, motherfucker! Fuck trees, I climb buoys, motherfucker! I'm on the deck with my boys, motherfucker! This boat engine make noise, motherfucker!

Siwon: Shisus does not approve.

And for those of you who have lived under a rock, you should watch this.

TKPA

Valeska's Guest Blog!

Super Junior Sex, The Latest Subgroup of Super Junior

Author’s note: 99% of this story was written before Han Geng requested for termination of his exclusive contract. I don’t take sides in this case. However, Han Geng will forever be my favorite China man. No matter what.

Hallelujah! A new subgroup has been added to Super Junior family and this subgroup is called SJ-S a.ka Super Junior Sex.

Why Sex?

Because instead of targeting the Chinese market like Super Junior Mandarin (SJ-M) or even the elders like Super Junior Trot (SJ-T), SJ-S is targeting the sexually-frustrated girls (*cough*including me *cough*) market. Sex is what they show us and sex is what we aim for.

SJ-S is a 4-members group, consisted of Han Geng a.ka Chinese Thrust Machine, Eunhyuk a.ka Sir Pops-A-Lot, Siwon a.ka Abmighty Shisus, and Henry a.ka Juicy Angel Lips. These are the four guys that can make you forget the threesome concept, as you will welcome the fivesome concept, which sounds more awesome.

The upcoming promotional single will be a catchy song which is full of groans, moans, and all the sexual sounds that can turn you on. You can imagine Siwon's bass voice singing some R&B tunes or Henry's rap in perrrrfect English blend together beautifully. The single may not be suitable to be listened to at night times (alone in your room and listening to some sexy creatures singing sexy tunes? That's frustrating), but who cares? We enjoy our frustration of sex.

Well, at least I know I do.

As I've mentioned before, sex is what they show us. I expect that the MV will be freaking hot as hell, 10 times hotter than "Sorry Sorry Answer" MV. You do realize that Chinese Thrust Machine looks so gorgeous with a prestigious Jaguar in that MV, right? In this upcoming MV of SJ-S, he will once again drive a Jaguar and probably will make love in the backseat of the car.

No, not with this woman. I can ensure you that he won't make love with this woman.

Speaking of hot Chinese men, I won’t leave Juicy Angel Lips out of the talk, of course. His transformation from a cute, innocent boy to a damn hot and tempting man has amazed me. Juicy Angel Lips has officially become The Canadian Sex Symbol. He’s a multi-talented guy. He speaks four languages, he can play the piano very well, he can sing, he’s also a dancing-machine, and everyone knows about his incredible ability in playing the violin. In conclusion, he’s more amazing than the Niagara Falls.

Pretty Pretty Princess: Let me tell you something, kid. Show ‘em your angry-sex face. They’re gonna love it.

Juicy Angel Lips: Will do, Your Majesty.

I also expect to see SJ-S doing some irritatingly inviting dance moves that will trigger my primitive lust to raise. Since chest-popping will be so 2000 late, I hope Sir Pops-A-Lot will come up with a brighter idea for the group, like crotch-popping, for example. I love it when Sir Pops-A-Lot puts his hand on his crotch and pop it like crazy.

Damn, you can thrust it into me, love. You are most welcome.

Last, but not least, the Abmighty Shisus. I have no idea about his image in SJ-S. He is sexy, always has been and always will be. Maybe he will show a much sexier image that your brain will explode once you see him dancing, half naked.

SJ-S has to be on numerous of variety shows. They will be epic. Sir Pops-A-Lot will be the spotlight of the show (Hyukkiegayo, anyone?) while Abmighty Shisus will show his legendary Shibrows here, there, and everywhere. I don’t know what you think of Shibrows, but I think they are amazing.

Now, if you excuse me, I will buy a one-way ticket to Seoul. Soon I will hijack SM Entertainment office and become the new CEO of SM Entertainment. You will be grateful. I’ll send SJ-S to America and Europe for world tour. Happy?

I bet you are. Even Chinese Thrust Machine is happy.

TKPA Endnote: This. Was. Fucking. Amazing. Thanks Valeska!

Abmighty Shisus Isn't the Only Holy One

If you missed the announcement last night, several more members of Super Junior have been TKPA nicknamed. Included in that batch of hilarity and "so true," was Han Geng.

His new nickname? Chinese Thrust Machine. There really needs to be no explanation on that, but if you don't understand, go watch any peformance of "Don't Don" and you'll know why.

But Abmighty Shisus isn't the only holy member in Super Junior. No, Chinese Thrust Machine has his own form of holy hotness going on. The proof is in the screen shot.

He's like the badass, leather-clad angel sent down from K-Pop Heaven to punish us for our sins and make us seek salvation in between his bedsheets. Abmighty Shisus might be holy hot, but he's more likely to sit us down with a cup of hot cocoa and preach to us, while holding our hand and reading Bible verses. Don't be fooled, the hand-holding is to prevent you from running away and commiting sweet sin with the Chinese Thrust Machine.

Yeah, I saw this while rewatching the Super Junior-M MV for "Super Girl" and I tried to find any excuse to post it.

TKPA

Say Whaaat?

Pretty Pretty Princess: Fan girls, fan girls, in the crowd ...who's the most charming member of all?

Han Geng: Shut the fuck up, Cinderella. Just sing the last damn line.

Abmighty Shisus: I'm with Hannie on this. Pride is the deadliest of the seven sins, you know.

Pretty Pretty Princess: Don't hate me because I'm beautiful.

Thanks to @nengvaleska for the picture and caption!

TKPA

Han Geng: Hottest Chinese Man Alive

Honestly, I don't have much to say in detail about Han Geng. I'm not feeling one-hundred-percent this morning (maybe it's karma from this, maybe not), so I'm going to keep it brief. I know the luscious Hankyung deserves more, but he'll be the main focus at another time, preferably when my knee doesn't feel like it's about to explode in pain.

He has become hotter as the years progress.

There are a lot of reasons why I love this man. For one, he cooks. This is extremely important to me seeing as how, even though I am rather talented in the kitchen, I'm also very cursed in the kitchen. I can make a mean apple pie, but as soon as I open a cabinet a broiler pan will fucking attack my foot, causing it to turn a nasty shade of dead-person-purple. (That did actually happen two months ago). Any man who can and is willing to spare me from potentially and accidentally harming and/or killing myself is a man I treasure dearly.

Also, I L-O-V-E his Chinese/Korean/English. It's freaking amazing. Poor thing gets so confused sometimes, answering in Chinese when he's supposed to talk in Korean, speaking in Korean when he's supposed to answer in English. He tries, and that's the important thing. Han, lovely, I will without a doubt tutor you in English ... right after you save me from myself in the kitchen. Don't worry, I'll put on those yellow rubber gloves and do the dishes. Without complaint.

That's love, you know.

Yours,

TKPA

Super Junior-M's "Super Girl": Chinese v. Korean

I wanted to go to sleep an hour and a half ago, but here's the thing about me ... I don't sleep.

Literally about an hour ago, The K-Pop Junkie mentioned how I should include Super Junior-M's "Super Girl" to the playlist (featured on the right sidebar). I said, "But it's Chinese, not Korean." Thus, there would be no point in putting it on here, even if it is by a subgroup of the largest boyband in the world, Super Junior.

I was on Twitter when I saw from multiple people that SJ-M has now released the Korean version of "Super Girl." I became super excited and rushed to play it ... only to find that I actually like the Chinese version better. It's still a fantastic song in any language, but because I've heard it so much in Chinese, it just sounds weird.

But then I listened to it again. And I am now in love with it. Again. I'd show proper enthusiasm about it, but I'm starting to feel the sleep creep up on me and it's becoming nearly impossible to keep my eyes open. So, I'll just cut to the chase and keep this short.

Here's the Korean version. (Watch in HQ for the ultimate sexiness of Donghae, Kyuhyun, Siwon, Ryeowook, Han Geng, Henry, and the cross between Leeteuk and Siwon, Zhou Mi). And here is the Chinese version. (Also watch in HQ).

I know that The K-Pop Junkie is going to go bat-shit crazy over this, seeing as how her Baby-Daddy-To-Be list includes Siwon, Hae, Kyun, and Han Geng.

Yours,

The K-Pop Addict