Again, late to the game, but shut up I'm blogging aren't I?
FUCK YES THE SPOCK EARS ARE BACK, LADIES!!
So happy, so happy, so happy, so happy!
Sex God you have completely washed away all of the seething anger I have toward Master GD and his ridiculous choice of a hairstyle. Then again, knowing you and our on-again, off-again love, you probably encouraged him to do that to his hair. That's okay, you totally won me over with your chess-moves, bb.
Spock ears are back! Spock ears are back! No more derranged Edward Scissorhands!
TKPA
I just want to pinch their cute little rookie cheeks so hard!
Pinching not limited to facial area ...
I missed gushing over my MBLAQ babies. I missed it so much I decided to caption this picture.
Mir: TKPA! You're back! Ummm, we didn't expect you back so soon! You kinda caught me off guard.
Lips of Sex: I'm so happy you're back. Now I get to regularly read about how plump and Starburst-like my lips are.
Antonio Jung: Why are we putting our fingers together?
Thunder: You mean you're finally back? No way! I don't believe it!
Sex Apprentice: Hey, LoS. She might write about your lips a lot, but we all know whose cocky grin and abs make her lose her mind.
Ladies and gentlemen reading this blog ... we need a moment of silence to honor this luscious, tan Korean.
.......................
Moment over. Dirrrty time.
I know I'm late in vocalizing my absolute lust and oh-my-fucking-God feelings toward rookie Jinon, but there is no such thing as being late when it comes to the rookie group F.Cuz's leader. Well, unless you have a crazy one night stand with him and then you're "late" a month later ... but even then it's not a bad thing. Because that one-night-stand, unplanned baby would have half of Jinon's gene pool.
And plus ... you'd probably be poking a hole in the condom before he puts it on, anyway. Don't deny it. You know you would.
But DAMN this boy kills me. He has a bit of a smolder stare going on. And he's a rapper. And his voice is kind of deep and raspy when he raps. And you all know how much I love all three of those things, but when they're combined?
OH MY GOD.
Jinon, Jinon, Jinon ... my new rookie love (sorry Lips of Sex and Sex Apprentice. And Jun Hyung). I can't wait to see more of you. Raspy voice and smolder stare and all.
TKPA
But this is freaking ridiculous.
What the HELL is that atrocious thing you call a hairdo? No, really, lovely ... what is that?
I really don't appreciate you doing this to me, Master GD. We all know you tend to get a little jealous when my attention is not fully on you and I'm not worshipping/lusting/drooling over you and only you ... and yes, you're probably very pissed off that I am now in a very committed relationship, and therefore I my worshipping/lusting/drooling over you must be decreased to the bare minimum ...
BUT STILL WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS AND HOW THE FUCK COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME?
Just because I took a little blogging hiatus doesn't mean I wasn't paying attention to you and your sneaky ways.
Shisus, I would much rather have the blonde back. I demand it back, actually. I want this so bad:
But not the curls. Fuck no. Those Goldilocks need to go down in K-Pop history as the worst hairstyle ever, alongside 2PM's palm trees.
If you love me even a smidgen still, G Baby, then you will bring this look back. Because I still love you. After all, I am the GD Whisperer. You cannot break the connection we have, bb. Heinous hairstyle or not.
Please bring back the unnatural sex factor that is the unnatural blonde. I miss it so.
TKPA
It's baaaaack! (And soon enough, so will yours truly!)
Admit it ... there is just one male idol, above all others, that just does something to you. He makes your ovaries twitch and ache and makes your uterus long for a tenant for forty weeks. It doesn't matter what he does. A new or old performance, a TV appearance, or even just looking at a damn picture sends you into a complete melt-down state of wanting to enter motherhood.
You know exactly who I'm talking about.
This isn't necessarily a category, it's more like bragging rights. Only the top five will be posted on the right sidebar, like the holy list of men you want to have lots of unprotected sex with.
It can be any idol, from any group so long as he's over the legal age, because I don't want to start promoting teen parenting. I'm already going to K-Pop hell by corrupting your minds, I don't want to add another thing to the list. You can vote for more than one guy, because you know that I have an incredibly difficult time choosing between Master GD and Sex God. I don't expect you to choose between two (or three) luscious idols; I sure as hell can't. Note: It can be as many as you want, but try to keep it under ... oh, let's say six men, okay?
You can either: comment, email, or tweet me your choices. I'll be keeping track and tallying the scores and then I'll announce the top five. Every few months or so we'll vote again to update the Cervix Punchers and see if your hearts (or ovaries) have found new loves (or baby daddies). Let's close this when one idol reaches fifty votes, okay?
Back in November, we held this little poll. Not a shocker that Sex God came out on top (hah), followed closely by King of Foreplay, Master GD, Sexy Beast Taek, and really shocking was Arms of Sex.
Get to it!
TKPA
