My Recent Suicide Mission/Humiliation

(Credit to jaypark.com)

I don't know if this will go anywhere, but I figured, "Why the hell not try?" No harm in that, right?

Feel free to laugh at me, because I know for sure this will either go unseen or will automatically be deleted. (Plus, I was laughing the whole time while writing this).

Subject: Interview Request (It's a Long Shot)
From: kpopaddict@live.com
To: info@jaypark.com

My name is [blah blah blah], better known in the K-Pop world as "The K-Pop Addict." I own and operate the blog, Confessions of the K-Pop Addict, which has readers all over the globe and has very recently been featured in the recent issue of Sparkling magazine (based out of the Philippines), alongside other top K-Pop websites such as http://www.allkpop.com/ and http://www.soompi.com/.

I realize this is sort of like a suicide mission in terms of requesting a brief interview with Jay, but it's a risk I'm willing to take. I have shied away from featuring Jay on the blog for quite some time, as it seemed that there was so much emotion surrounding his former situation. Whenever I would try to feature him there was always a reader or two who did not understand the humor behind the words. Now that I feel like his past is behind him and he's starting anew and succeeding beautifully, I would like to interview him (via e-mail) on a more personal level but about his current life and not about his past (i.e. nothing about 2PM or him leaving Korea. It's time we all moved on from that).

That might not seem like a "suicide mission," but I haven't gotten to the part where I actually inform you what the blog is based around. It's only fair that I provide you every post written about Jay, so you may get the feel of the style of writing. This is the suicide part.

http://www.thekpopaddict.com/search/label/park%20jaebeom

Thank you for your time and consideration and please feel free to laugh and delete this email once you're finished reading.

TKPA :)

Yes, I gave his management team the link to every post written about Jay. And if you click that link ... let's just hope that Jay has a sense of humor.

Just thought I would share and if for some unlikely reason I get a positive response (aka "YES"), I will share that with you. For now let's just assume it's a fat "N-O." I'm content with that.

TKPA

Sparkling is Out!

This makes me ridiculously happy and I thank everyone who has ever read this blog for loving it (or hating it) and giving it attention, because this truly wouldn't have happened if it weren't for you!

If you're a new reader because of this magazine, then leave a comment below and say hi! Also, check out the older posts, and you're more than welcome to leave comments! That goes for all you old folks too!

If you live in the Philippines and haven't yet picked yourself up a copy of Sparkling magazine with 2PM on the cover ... well, what are you waiting for? It's an entire feature for K-Pop!

Thanks for everything :)

xox

TKPA

Cervix Punchers Fifth Edition: And the Winners Are ...

#5 Chansung with twenty-one votes.

Let's introduce the beastliest maknae of them all to the top five for the very first time! Please don't ever hide your abs or your happy trail from us. Be a good idol and give us what we want. In return, we'll give you what you want. Fair trade, everyone wins!


#4 Heechul with twenty-six votes.

I'm not going to lie, I'm still shocked as all hell. And he received three more votes this time around. He's one of those idols that suddenly appears out of nowhere and kind of leaves a total mindfuck into what he did recently that made him so relevant in your minds and other areas.


#3 Taeyang with forty-five votes.

Taeyang might have fallen from number two, but at least he can have those bragging rights amongst the idols that he's been in the top five for a year straight. Congratulations, bb! You just keep being you and I know you'll always have a home in the top five!


#2 G-Dragon with fifty votes.

YES. THAT MEANS THAT G-DRAGON HAS FINALLY LEFT HIS COVETED NUMBER THREE SPOT AND HAS MOVED UP ONE!!! It was a close race between GDYB, but again, congratulations to GD for being in the top five for a year straight and also taking the spotlight of number two onto himself.


#1 T.O.P with sixty votes.

SIXTY votes. This man will never leave the top five. Never ever.

Voting will be again in February! Thanks for participating!

TKPA

Cervix Punchers Fifth Edition: Numbers Six through Ten

#10 Jonghyun (15 votes) - So what if he has a girlfriend? Doesn't mean we have to stop looking, right? Stop touching, yes. Looking? FAIR GAME.

#10 Nichkhun (15 votes) - I pretty much agree with this ranking, except I really want to add a personal comment ... Would it really kill you to not do "fan talk" while I'm sleeping? Really devastating when you start tweeting at 4:45 in the friggin morning and my alarm goes off at 5:30. I know you're reading this, Khunnie. (Yeah, right).

#10 Yunho (15 votes) - I will admit, I was a little surprised by how many votes he did receive. Not because he isn't fine as hell (because he is), but only because he's barely received any votes in the past. A ranking I'm happy with, though.


#9 Junsu from 2PM (16 votes) - I don't think I am alone in requesting more shirtless pictures of this man. He might break the top five if he spams us with abs to help keep us warm during the winter (or get us hotter in the summer, whichever hemisphere you're in).

#9 Jaejoong (16 votes) - I am contributing this to the fact that most of you living in the United States saw this gorgeous human being up close and in person recently. Because again, he's never received this many votes before. First time for everything!

#9 Seungri (16 votes) - So proud of him, yes I am! I mean, people actually voted for him! More than two or three times! AND HE DIDN'T EVEN HAVE TO TAKE HIS SHIRT OFF. Wait ... we might want to rethink this.


#8 Jun Hyung (17 votes) - He's climbing, he's climbing! Nice to know that whatever ridiculously ugly thing he has on, we still find him desirable. That's very hard to accomplish.

#8 Se7en (17 votes) - Absolutely gorgeous. Him and those lips. Mmm.

#8 Rain (17 votes) - He needs to have another movie like Ninja Assassin. Or more choreography like "Hip Song." That will surely catapult him a little higher.


#7 Kyuhyun (18 votes) - My all-time favorite maknae is killing it. Maybe in February he will break the top five? Stranger things have happened.

#7 Daesung (18 votes) - Basically, seventeen of you are running the risk of losing your life. It was the picture with him and the Phantom of the Opera mask, wasn't it? Just don't tell CJ you voted for him if she asks. She's already asking for names (those of you who were anonymous, smart move).


#6 Onew (20 votes) - Every once in a while, an idol gets so many votes just out of nowhere. Where were all of you for the past year? What, SHINee comes back and you suddenly remember Onew? Tsk, tsk, tsk. (Kiddingggg!)

#6 Joon (20 votes) - HE HAS FALLEN. Oh, Joon. Let's fix this! GET A TWITTER ACCOUNT. But not until January, then spam the hell out of us with cutesy and sexy pictures of you in the bathroom mirror.


Are you calculating who's in the top five?

Cervix Punchers Fifth Edition: Almost, But Not Quite

#15 Han Geng (7 votes) - It doesn't matter that he's in China doing God knows what. We still love that sexy man and worship him as if he'd never left.

#15 Leeteuk (7 votes) - You either get the attraction with him or you don't. If you don't, I'm pretty sure the people who voted for him won't mind. We can be greedy.

#15 Eli (7 votes) - The adorkable Eli. I want to see this man get a little higher next time around!

#15 Soohyun (7 votes) - So many votes from you have made me pay some extra special attention to him. Expect to see more of him on the blog!


#14 Taekyeon (9 votes) - Oh, sweetie. You've fallen from your glory days of ranking in the top five. Last November, you were #4. In February, you were #2. Now you're completely out of the top ten? How about some more shirtless action and screaming during performances to boost you back up a bit. Or you could just reply to a nice fan every once in a while ... mhm.

#14 AJ (9 votes) - You've kind of won me over a little more than you previously did by being the new-geek-turned-hottie in your latest MV. I wholeheartedly approve.

#14 DongWoon (9 votes) - I wish I could say you were the sexiest maknae on the list, but dude ... you really got your ass kicked in the ranking maknae battle. However, if you keep up those dirty blonde locks of yours, you'll rank higher on my personal poll, which means more exploitation on the blog. Win-win for everyone!

#14 Siwon (9 votes) - I'm curious as to how many of you have fantasized about him in a priest get-up and a steamy confessional booth location.


#13 Junsu from JYJ (10 votes) - I guess ten of you really, really liked his halter top/apron. I joke.

#13 Junho (10 votes) - I could make some cracks about how your ass is bigger than a full moon or that if you put on a wig you could be Kim Kardashian's from-the-back body double ... but it's all been done before.

#13 Jay Park (10 votes) - Last night on Twitter, Jay said some of us were freaky. I think a really dirty post is in the works, in which all of you need to leave a highly dirty comment. (PS -- Jay, if you're reading this, can you tweet some pics of your abs to get back into the top five? Thanks).


#12 Minho (12 votes) - Sexy, sexy, sexy. I love the shorter hair. I love the deep voice. I love the angry-sexy look he always has. I will so be your sugar mama.


#11 SeungHo (14 votes) - YOU. WERE. ROBBED. You should have been higher. That is all.

Six through ten, coming up next!